Remembering 9/11

In about 8 hours it will have been exactly 10 years since the horrible events of 9/11 began. I've been sitting on the computer here looking at pictures, reading stories and just re-living that day. It's crazy how you could ask anyone to tell you what they were doing the moment they found out and they could remember it like it was yesterday. I've never written down my experience so I thought I would "write" it.
On the night of September 10th I went over to my sister's house to sleep over. I was leaving early the next morning with her, her husband and kids and driving to Disneyland. Woo hoo!!! Jen and Laron came downstairs around 10 and told me we were leaving right then instead. I don't remember the details...something about Laron thinking we had reservations in Vegas the next night but really they were this day. Anyway, we packed everything up and headed to Vegas. We checked into the Stratosphere hotel in the middle of the night and we all went to sleep.
In the morning we all woke up and started getting ready for the day. Laron decided to turn on the TV and that's when we saw the news. I wasn't really paying attention to the TV when he turned it on, I was playing with one of the kiddos. I just remember Laron yelling to Jen who was in the bathroom getting ready "Jen, come look at this". I turned and looked too. We all just stared in disbelief.
The next thing I remember is feeling panicked because we were in the Stratosphere and they were having all of us evacuate. All the well-known (especially tall) buildings all over the US were on high alert.
After we evacuated we just started driving to California. The rest of the trip was quite interesting. We still went to Disneyland and Sea World like planned, but the whole mood of the trip was pretty somber. I remember my brother in law, especially, was extremely preoccupied. Every opportunity to hear coverage was taken. Every time we were in the car the radio was on, the second we got into the hotel we flipped on the news. My poor nephews didn't understand what was going on. I remember Lane, who was 6 at the time saying something like "Why do we keep having to watch these buildings burning?". I think he was getting annoyed with the fact that we wouldn't let him watch "fun TV".
We heard President Bush speak over the radio while we were driving. I just remember thinking about how many millions of people from all walks of life were listening to the same thing I was at that same moment. I felt so united. I was reminded of a scene in the movie Armageddon when they show people all over the country glued to their TVs and radios listening to the president give them scary news.
A few days later, the nation had a moment of silence. I was at Disneyland by myself with my three nephews. Jen and Laron had left to go to a concert. They shut all the rides down. The happiest place on earth stood still while we all took a moment to think about the week's events.
I loved seeing all the patriotism and pride in the following weeks. American flags were EVERYWHERE. It was beautiful. Everyone seemed to be grateful and kind. I wish we could always be that way.
It's been 10 years and it's crazy to re-live those events and feelings. Reflecting on this makes me feel so humble and blessed for all the wonderful things in my life. I pray for all those who had to actually live through and experience that day up close and personal. God bless. Now if you'll excuse me I need to go give my husband and my daughter a huge hug and kiss.

The Waiting Game

If you look on the right side of this blog you'll see that cute little brunette holding a stuffed bunny telling us all that my little girl is done cooking. Well, if this is true then shouldn't I be holding her in my arms and kissing her soft little mushy face right now? Ha ha, ok I know that most people don't have their babies on their due date, but for 9 months I have had a date in my mind so all of the sudden when that day comes and goes and my little nugget is still in utero, I tend to get a little anxious.
Is she going to come tomorrow? Am I going to have to wait another week? Is she ok in there? It's the unknown that's so exciting, stressful, frustrating, amazing!!!
Things are going well, I'm just so ready. I never thought I'd get to that place because I've always had a list of things that I wanted to get done before she got here. Well, the list is finally complete and so I'm emotionally and physically ready. Today was my last day at work (I do have to go back for a few days in August, but I'm pretty much done). Here I wait....regardless of what happens it's still crazy to think that in less than a week I will have my baby. Yay!!!!
She is moving around like crazy as I'm typing right now. We've been chatting all day. I told her this morning that today was her special day and there were a lot of people, especially her Mommy and Daddy, that are really excited to meet her. She just doesn't like everyone making a big deal about her arrival. She's so shy and modest so I'm trying to calm her nerves. Ha ha, ok now I clearly need to go to bed. Happy Baby Week for Me!!!!

"The Cease"

Two days after hearing the news about my grandpa, we lost our Cici. As I'm typing this I still can't believe it. This was completely unexpected, she died in her sleep. She was only 2 years old.
Those of you who know Trent and I know that she was like our kid. We loved that dog SO MUCH. She was an indoor dog and as quirky as they come. I've never met a dog like her. Her favorite thing ever was to be by us. She was fiercely loyal, LOVED to cuddle and to get her head and neck rubbed. She really was one of the fam.
I've NEVER had a connection with an animal like this in my whole life. When we decided to get her it wasn't because we wanted a dog, it was because we wanted her and specifically her.
I keep typing things and deleting things over and over, but honestly there isn't much else that I want to say publicly except that We Love You Cease and Miss You Like Crazy!!!.

Showing off her sweet moves

Zonked out in the truck after a weekend at the cabin

Family Pic



Recovering after her accident/surgery

Love you Cease!!!

Grandpa Henry

The past couple of weeks have been extremely emotional for me. It started when I received an email from my aunt explaining to all the family that my Grandpa was not doing too well. He had been feeling really tired among other things. Several individuals from my family decided to make time in the upcoming weekend to go to Idaho to see him. In between the email and the time we got there, they admitted my grandpa to the hospital. He had pneumonia and some other complications.
I didn't like seeing him in the hospital, he's always been so energetic and able bodied that it was quite different to see him confined to a bed, but his spirit's were still high as always. He was crackin' jokes and telling stories like normal.
I'm so grateful that I was able to give him a hug that day and tell him that I love him. During the next few days, things physically took a turn for the worst and my grandpa passed away a few days later.
Receiving the news from my Dad brought me to tears (at work conveniently :). I started thinking about memories of him and stories that he's told me. My grandpa was a few months shy of 91 so I knew this day was coming in the near future, but it's still tough to hear that your grandpa is no longer here.
The funeral was wonderful. I know that might sound a little silly, but it was really one of the most peaceful and calm experiences I've had in a really long time. My grandpa was THE BEST example of how to live the gospel. Will I miss him, of course, but I KNOW I will see him again. I know that he lived his life the best he possibly could've.
One of my most cherished experiences with him was one night when he stayed up with me into the wee hours of the morning talking. This conversation happened during a time in my life when I really needed some guidance. I was able to tell him how much that conversation meant to me and the impact it had on my life. The whole reason we come to this earth is to be tested and he passed his test with flying colors and anyone who knew him would agree. It was nice to get together with family and celebrate his life. I didn't get a chance to talk with all of my cousins or other relatives the day of his funeral, but I've also never felt closer to them. My testimony has been strengthened through this experience and I believe it has a lot to do with the way that he lived his life and because of the example that he was. This has truly been a spiritual experience for me. Love you and miss you grandpa...until we meet again.

(My parents, Trent and I, and Grandma and Grandpa Henry)

The Babe

I can't believe how fast this pregnancy is going. I feel extremely blessed for the way I've been feeling so far. Besides those first six weeks, I've felt great. I don't even feel pregnant except for when I look down and see my ever growing tummy. I pray in gratitude everyday for the way this has all been going. We had our 20 week recently. It's crazy how the words "she has all four chambers in her heart" and "look there are two kidneys" can make my little heart melt. Our little babe is such a good girl growing all her parts like she should. Oh PS...we are having a GIRL!!! I've told a lot of people, but I never made one big announcement about it. I kept meaning to, but I wanted to upload pictures of us finding out and I struggle SO MUCH uploading pictures on our computer so I put off a lot of blogging. My friend Lindsay is an ultrasound tech and scanned me, but Trent couldn't be there (this was ultrasound #3 by the way. Our little one is quite the modest one...and she'd better stay that way :) Ha ha, anyway I really wanted to find out with Trent so Lindsay took a picture and then burned it on a CD for me to take home. That night Trent and I sat at our computer together and pulled up the CD that said "It's girl".
Trent and I both thought it was a girl from the beginning. Let's be honest, we had a 50/50 chance, but we both felt strong about it.

I'd better take back what I said about not feeling pregnant at all. I guess I just meant I haven't felt sickly pregnant. I'm definitely noticing all the changes. I have been feeling her for about two weeks now. Crazy feeling!!! It feels like there is a little snake or goldfish inside me. I don't feel kicks or anything, I feel slithers. Ha ha, I love when I poke her and she pokes/slithers back. It's awesome!!! I've also started visiting the bano much more frequently. I used to never wake up in the night to go to the restroom. Well, those days are over. Will I ever see them again? One can dream right? Ha ha, I get up at least once, sometimes more, a night. The sleeping on the stomach days are just about over, in fact they might be done. I have started to feel more emotional as well. I have been pretty non-emotional so far. Well, not non-emotional, I was emotional before I got pregnant, but I didn't feel EXTRA emotional...until this week. I think the waterwork hormones are finally kicking in. In fact, as I'm sitting here typing this Trent asked me what I was writing about. I said "our baby" and he said what are you saying. I started reading it to him and when I got to the part that I said "It's crazy how the words....." I started crying, I couldn't even read it to him. Ha ha, the tears have been flowing a little more freely this past week.
Anyway, things are going well and I couldn't be happier about this whole experience so far. "Little girl, I'm kind of fond of you" :)

2nd Trimester Bliss!!!

It's true what people have been telling me. The second trimester is a great place to be. Ok I'm "technically" still a week away but I sure am feeling good. I must say I've been pretty blessed compared to some stories I've heard. The month of December was not a very good month for me as far as the way I was feeling. I remember even thinking "Will I ever feel good again?" I had zero energy and A LOT of queezy feelings. It started off as ravenous hunger ALL THE TIME. I just constantly was needing to eat food or I would feel nauseous. As long as I was eating it wasn't as bad, but eating started to get old really quick because I was running out of foods that didn't make me gag. I didn't have a problem finding things to eat at first, but once I ate a particular thing I couldn't eat it again. I'd be hungry and eat a sandwich and then from that point on if I ever thought about that sandwich again I would feel nauseous. Then, I decided it would be a good idea to get the flu. Oh my, that week was a bad one.
Anyway, I woke up this past Monday morning and I felt kind of normal. It continued through the whole day. It was the first time in weeks that I worked a normal day without wishing I was home in bed. I've felt that way this whole week. It's awesome!!! I actually have energy to do things and I haven't felt woozy at all. Knock on wood that this isn't just a fluke.

Bun in the Oven

I still can't believe it. There is a wee one growing inside me. This week we're working on fingerprints and trying to get it to where the head doesn't make up 50% of its body. Grow body grow!!!
On a cold Saturday morning in November I decided to wake up and go run a 5K with Emily. This was also known as day 46. The day I told myself I would take a test if I hadn't started my period. After the run, breakfast with Emily and the drive home my thoughts were in a million different places, not on taking a test. I really had to go to the bathroom. As I run upstairs the thought hits me "Today is the day you are supposed to take a test". I had to go so bad (TMI) and I've taken so many negative tests when I thought my period was taking too long that I was like "Nah, I'm not pregnant, don't worry about it". Well, at the last second I just grabbed a test and decided "Ah, why not?" Well, those lines did not hesitate showing up. No they did not, big and bold they were in a matter of seconds.
Time stood still.
Uh........what? Are you serious? No way? Really? Nah!!! Is this real right now? PS-These were all happy are you serious's. We had been trying for this but I just didn't expect it to happen already. My doctor told me to expect to wait a while and be patient because my cycles are ridiculously long and unpredictable. I was in a bit of shock. I just stared at the thing for quite a while. Is this really the moment? Ahh!!! I can't believe it!!!!
To this day it hasn't fully sunk in. I mean I believe it, but at the same time I don't believe it. I can't wait until I can feel the little nugget move around and stuff. I'm so excited and the due date is July 18th. Some days that feels so soon and other days it feels like it is never going to get here. I'm SOOOOOO excited!!!